Letter From A Friend

Dear Melba-

Thank you so very much for my new jammies. It's the best Christmas pressie ever! I have had them on ever since your human brought them to me, and I get very upset if anyone tries to take them off. They keep me very snuggly warm. At 13 years old you can imagine how important that is. Going outside, lounging around the house, and sleeping in bed have all been made much better with the gift of my new jammies.

The other morning my human took me out side with all the other whippies I live with. The little whipper snappers were running around while Toby and I were leisurely strolling about. Toby was over by the fence standing on three legs so I decided I better go check on him and see what he was doing. Next thing I know one of my humans scoops me up, runs me up the steps and starts hollering "Hon, hon come here." (I would sure like to know who "Hon" is. I live with my 2 humans and 4 other whippets, NONE of whom are named hon last time I checked).

Anyway, my other human comes to the door and I hear the one that's holding me say "Monika needs to be cleaned up, she just walked through Toby's pee." What?!?! What is he talking about? I didn't walk through anyone's pee. He MUST mean that someone peed ON me. This man is silly. He must be loosing his mind. What whippet do you know would knowingly walk through pee? Sheesh.

Well my other human takes me inside and to the room at end of the hall. She then proceeds to remove my jammies. Oh my god! What is this crazy lady thinking? Why on earth is she doing this to me? Then she takes them and throws them into this big machine! I was very upset, and getting more so by the moment. I kept pacing around in circles in the room, and nudging her with my head but it didn't stop her.... She turned the machine on! I stood there in horror as my jammies started to go around and around in circles... I could see them in there. It was like a bad nightmare. They were getting wet, and getting some bubbly stuff on them and still going around and around in circles. The crazy lady that put them in there left the room. She must have known I was thinking about biting her for all this trauma she was causing me.

So there I was... just standing there all alone... watching, and praying my jammies would survive....

I walked down the hall a few times to try and get the crazy lady to come and give me my jammies back but she just kept telling me "They'll be done in a few minutes Monika." Back I went to the room with the machine, to watch my jammies........

After some time, I think it was about an hour, not a few "minutes" as she had said the crazy lady came back to the room. I stood there very excited as she opened the door on the machine. "Yiippeee... Yippeee... my jammies" I exclaimed.

But do you know what that crazy lady did next? She put them into ANOTHER machine!! I am convinced as of this time that she isn't even "crazy." Now I think she belongs in a mental hospital for sure. Can someone help me contact the men in the white coats?

Atleast in this other machine my jammies weren't getting wet anymore... they were just tumbling around and around. Again, there I stood, just watching in horror.

After another 20 minutes the insane human comes back down the hall. She kept telling me how "cute" I was. Cute?!?! My legs were killing me by this point with all the standing around, and she has the nerve to tell me how cute I am??? Again.. someone contact the men in the white coats.

Finally, FINALLY she takes them out of the other machine. I decided before she did something else with them I would jump on her to remind her I was standing right there, and that the jammies were MINE. (She needs to keep her hands off of them if you ask me.) Amazingly she put them back on me.... I think I had her shaking in her shoes by then, and she figured she better give them back before someone got hurt!

After all that I pranced back down the hall to my bed by the fireplace. I stayed there most of the evening, and kept clear of the lunatic lady. I'll have my eye on her from now on.

So thanks again Melba, I do love my jammies. I promise I'll keep a better hold on them so they don't go falling into the wrong hands again. =O)

Love,
Monika